Absurd Hope: How Imagination Can Support Healing in Child Therapy
By Michelle Smith, MA, LMHC, RPT™
As play therapists, we are always searching for creative, developmentally attuned ways to help children navigate distressing experiences, reduce anxiety and decrease emotional overwhelm.
Dr. Dan Siegel reminds us, “Play is not frivolous. It is brain-building and essential to healthy development.” These ideas come to life when we integrate the work of leading thinkers in play, attachment and neurobiology. The following clinicians and researchers illustrate how imagination, safety, connection and play can literally rewire the brain:
Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald – Hope and fear circuitry
Dr. Theresa Kestly – Play and somatic integration
Dr. Allan Schore – Attachment-based neurobiology
Dr. Jaak Panksepp – Affective neuroscience and core emotional systems
These four share the core belief that the brain’s neural circuits—whether related to fear, play, attachment or emotion—can be reshaped through safe, relational, and playful experiences. Their work highlights that healing is not just possible, but powered by connection, imagination and compassionate support.
At the center of this integration is what Dr. McDonald calls "absurd hope visualization.” This is when we intentionally imagine something silly, farcical, joyful, empowering and playful (like a flying giraffe with cotton candy wings or a unicorn that burps glitter and farts fireworks). These whimsical images don’t just entertain, they activate the brain’s hope circuitry and help children (and adults!) pendulate between fear and regulation.
How a Walk (and a Little Whimsy) Changed the Way I Understand how the Hope Circuit Works
Lake Chelan, Washington ~ July 2024
Last summer, on a quiet walk around Lake Chelan in Washington, I was listening to a podcast when I stumbled upon Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald's work. A reminder from Google Photos popped up recently, showing images from that trip. It was a peaceful getaway with my daughter and her two friends. As I walked, I listened to any interview with Dr. McDonald that I could find on Youtube. Her concept of absurd hope struck a deep chord. She teaches that we have both a fear circuit and a hope circuit in the brain, and that activating one quiets the other. In fact, they can't operate fully at the same time.
That day, I tried it myself. My absurd (and magical) hope was that I imagined being Taylor Swift's personal hugger. A handler would call to say Taylor was arriving by helicopter, just for a hug. Each hug would earn me a million dollars which I’d donate to trauma researchers like Dr. McDonald to keep this kind of work alive. It was funny, joyful and oddly empowering. That’s the magic! Now I have a whimsical tool to use when I notice that I am starting to get activated.
As Dr. McDonald puts it, “Hope is not the denial of fear. It’s the decision to move forward in the face of it.” (I think Taylor Swift would agree with this sentiment!) Dr. McDonald’s theory shows that absurd, playful visualizations (like imagining hugging Taylor Swift or flying on a pancake spaceship) can engage parts of the brain associated with safety, joy and possibility. It can give us just enough space to regulate, reflect and return to ourselves.
Bringing Absurd Hope to Life: A Fully Embodied Visualization
When developing an image of absurd hope, invite the child to engage all their senses to bring it vividly to life. The more detailed, silly and sensory-rich the visualization, the more powerfully it can serve as a regulating, embodied resource.
Encourage them to imagine not just what it looks like, but what it feels like in the body and the world around them.
Try prompts like:
What do you see or notice in your mind’s eye? Can you describe the colors, shapes, sparkle, movement or how it shows up for you?
What do you hear? Is your protector humming, whistling affirmations, playing kazoo music?
What do you feel? What textures are around you? Is the air warm and fuzzy? Breezy and sparkly?
What do you smell? Can you catch the scent of marshmallow clouds or dragonberry punch?
What do you taste? If your magical protector made you a snack, what would it be? Where can you taste that on your tongue?
To enhance the sensory experience, consider using child-safe essential oils or offering a mint-anything gentle that helps the child’s body stay present and regulated. These real-life sensations help bring the imagery from imagination into the felt sense, anchoring it as a truly embodied resource the child can return to during distress.
Absurd hope isn’t just imagined—it’s felt!
Since that walk, I’ve brought absurd hope into my therapy sessions, especially with older children and their caregivers. It’s become an invaluable resource during Phase 2 of EMDR (Preparation), particularly for clients who have few accessible adaptive memories. According to the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model, successful reprocessing depends on the brain's ability to link distressing memories with more adaptive, resilient networks. Many children, especially those with trauma and attachment ruptures, lack these kinds of experiences.
Absurd hope offers a creative, emotionally regulating anchor, something new for the brain to hold onto. Whether it's a glittery hippo solving problems with dance moves or a magical sidekick shouting affirmations, these whimsical images become neurobiological footholds for healing.
Why Playful Pendulation Works Neurobiologically
Dr. Allan Schore teaches us that emotional regulation develops in the context of secure attachment, and that the ability to shift between distress and calm (pendulation) relies on an integrated brain.
Dr. Theresa Kestly builds on this with somatic and play-based therapies, while Dr. McDonald’s absurd hope imagery invites a child to temporarily step outside distress—just long enough to re-regulate and return with more emotional capacity.
Dr. Jaak Panksepp’s research on core emotional systems like SEEKING, PLAY, and FEAR shows that activating PLAY and SEEKING circuits can inhibit FEAR. That’s the key: absurd hope is not just silly, it's neurologically strategic.
How to Integrate Absurd Hope into Child Therapy
Here are a few creative strategies to apply absurd hope imagery/visualization across child therapy modalities. These ideas are grounded in neuroscience, developmentally appropriate, and most importantly, they are playful!
1. CBT Play Therapy: Thought-Bending with Bananas
Help children challenge unhelpful thoughts using silly metaphors.
“What powerful reminders could your invisible banana suit tell when you feel nervous?”
This playful reframe helps children explore thought-feeling-behavior patterns without judgment or shame. Absurd imagery lowers defenses and invites curiosity, making cognitive work feel safe and engaging.
2. Puppet Play: Meet the Hope Heroes
Introduce absurdly powerful puppet characters—like a fart-powered dragon or a knight that eats so many marshmallows that they ooze from his ears creating a sticky, gooey mess wherever he goes—to help children externalize and process fear.
Let one puppet represent the fear, and another the absurd protector. Role-play conflict and resolution as a way to process internal struggles safely. The sillier the better!
3. Expressive Art Therapy: Draw the Absurd Animal Ally
Invite children to draw their absurd hope figures which might include a duck controlling a donut-shaped spaceship or a llama with lightning shoes that can help whisk them away to a peaceful land with cotton candy trees and chocolate rivers.
With the child’s permission, share these visual anchors with caregivers so they can serve as powerful tools for co-regulation and help the child return to a sense of safety during moments of dysregulation or overwhelm.
4. Sand Tray: Create a World Where Hope Wins
Use miniature figures to symbolize both distress and protection. When appropriate, the therapist can invite the child to build a world where a fantastical protector powerfully transforms or responds to the threat. This supports narrative integration by giving the child a chance to externalize and reshape their internal experience through symbolic play.
If the therapist notices the child naturally placing figures that suggest distress or protection, they might gently offer an open-ended invitation such as:
“I notice these figures seem really different from each other. I wonder what might happen if they met in this world you’re building?” or “Sometimes in sand tray, the characters can show us something that feels big inside—like something hard, or something brave. Would you like to see what happens next between them?”
This kind of language allows the child to explore transformation at their own pace, without pressure. It creates space for power and safety to emerge organically in the world they’ve created.
As play and imaginative engagement gently shift the child from a state of fear toward safety and empowerment, they begin to experience nervous system regulation from the inside out. By seeing their powerful protector triumph in the tray, children begin to experience new, embodied possibilities both in play and in real life.
5. The Flash Technique: Preposterous as PEF (Positive Engaging Focus)
Let the absurd hope visualization serve as the Positive Engaging Focus.
For example: “If you had your own magical creature who follows you around and cheers for you—what would it be, what would it say and what would it do when you feel nervous or sad?”
You can follow up with playful, regulating questions such as:
“What does it sound like when it cheers for you?”
“How does it help you feel brave again and remind you that brave is already inside of you?”
“Does it do a happy dance or throw sparkles when you stick up for yourself?”
“Where do you feel that brave and powerful feeling in your body?”
The goal is to spark joy and imagination so vividly that the nervous system shifts from threat into empowerment even before addressing any distress. When children access this absurd, playful visualization, they’re engaging their hope and play circuitry, creating just enough emotional distance and regulation to approach challenging experiences and difficult memories.
6. Attachment Repair: Laugh, Connect, Repeat through silly stories and safe hearts
Develop farcical imagery together with the child. Laugh and explore side-by-side to strengthen the therapeutic bond and deepen co-regulation. This is powerful both neurobiologically as well as relationally because absurd imagery bypasses shame and threat defenses and play activates the ventral vagal system (safe/social connection).
Co-creating silly stories fosters limbic resonance (deep emotional attunement that happens between people when their nervous systems "sync up”). This leads to co-regulation while shared laughter builds attachment safety, especially for children with trust and relationship ruptures.
7. EMDR: Tap in the magic
Build an inner resource toolkit using absurd imagery—safety shields, flying pets, magical costumes—to support EMDR Phase 2: Preparation. Guide the child to vividly imagine (or draw, create from clay) and fully develop their magical protector, then use bilateral stimulation to “tap in” this resource. The magical protector can be revisited throughout all EMDR phases, but is especially helpful during Phase 4: Desensitization, when distress may arise.
Ridiculously exaggerated and farcical imagery is also a powerful way to support pendulation, which is the nervous system's ability to shift between distress and safety. In trauma therapy, especially with children, farce builds resilience and nervous system flexibility without overwhelming the child.
You might say: “Let’s visit the scary place, but bring your rubber chicken army with you.”
This works because farce lowers threat perception by engaging humor, imagination, and play. At the same time, pendulation teaches the nervous system: “I can go toward the hard thing… and come back to safety.”
Absurdity activates the prefrontal cortex, interrupts freeze/shutdown states, and increases tolerance for distress by surrounding it with playful regulation and creative control.
Tip: For kids who have a hard time with visualization, Dixit cards are a wonderful tool to spark imagination and externalize inner resources. Their dreamlike, whimsical artwork makes it easier for children to choose images that represent protectors, safe places or emotional states, especially when words or mental pictures are hard to access.
8. Sensory Motor/Somatic Therapy: Moving with whimsy and Power
Invite the child to create a playful, silly or magical “absurd hope” image such as
“Imagine you're a giant taco dinosaur who stomps and roars ‘I am brave!’ and ‘I am strong!’ and exhales cheese-scented fire breath.”
Once the image is alive in their imagination, guide the child to notice the felt sense in their body. You might say:
“Where do you feel the roar in your body?”
“What kind of pose does your taco dinosaur do when it feels proud?”
“Can we try a breath like the dinosaur together?”
This somatic integration helps children not just imagine hope, but feel it, return to it and trust it in their bodies. That’s when hope becomes more than a story and becomes a real, embodied resource they can carry with them.
The Common Thread: Regulation Through Relationship and Imagination
This integration of hope, imagination, somatic awareness and attachment is powerful because it speaks the language of the child-which is play. Absurd hope visualization do not bypass traumatic or challenging experiences; it creates space around those experiences. It invites the child to return to the hard stuff with more support, imagination and internal strength.
Absurd hope doesn’t erase fear, it illuminates the path through it.
Final Reflections
As a therapist, this tool can help you explain brain science simply: that children (and adults) have internal surveillance systems always scanning for safety or danger. Absurd hope offers a playful way to interrupt fear and invite curiosity. It reduces shame by externalizing behavior as a wise, protective response.
I’ve used this model in EMDR, the Flash technique, expressive arts, puppet work as well as sensory motor therapy. It bridges left and right brain, body and story, fear and hope. It builds adaptive information and it strengthens attachment-all while being fun, whimsical and empowering.
Even if you’re not a therapist, absurd hope can help you too. It’s important to create your whimsical and hopeful imagery when you are feeling grounded. You can save a reminder to your phone background or lock screen as a visual cue that can gently remind you of your inner resource, especially when you’re sliding into anxiety, shame or overwhelm.
When You Notice that you are becoming activated by Fear or Anxiety, Try This:
Take a deep, slow breath. Or just notice that you are breathing.
Bring your attention to the space around you. Ground yourself to the here and now. You might notice a sound, texture or sensation that helps you feel grounded. Take in your surroundings however feels natural or comfortable. It can be through sound, touch, breath or even stillness
Recall your absurd hope. Are you a glittery owl who flies to the moon to gather powerful moon dust every time you begin to doubt your expertise?
Let it grow. Add details. Make it weird. Make it wonderful.
Move your body with it. Move with it in a way that feels right. You can sway, stretch or even imagine movement from the inside. Can your body feel the rhythm of it—even just with a breath, a gesture or a small shift? Tap-in the sensations if they are comfortable (lightly and slowly touch your knees or arms left-right-left).
Let it shift your state. Notice how your breathing changes. How your thoughts soften. How your body feels safer (even if it’s just the tiniest bit!).
This practice isn’t about escaping reality, it’s about giving your brain and body a moment of joy, imagination and possibility in the midst of stress. You're not denying fear; you’re inviting hope to share the stage.
Coming Soon: Absurd Adventure Cards
I’m currently developing a card deck with Absurd Adventure Prompts to use with clients for pendulation, regulation and connection.
Would you like a set? Let me know in the comments below.
I’d also love to hear what you'd like to see next. Let’s keep imagining and learning together.
Happy playing, happy imagining and happy healing!
a big thank you to the following:
Dr. McDonald, thank you for your insight and inspiration!
Dr. Kestly, thank you for bridging neurobiology with play and for introducing me to the work of Dr. Jaak Panksepp and Dr. Allan Schore in your Sand Tray Trainings!
Ann Meehan, RPT-S, thank you for always driving home how integral the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model is during EMDR consultations. Your guidance has helped me stay focused on the importance of creating adaptive experiences that children can anchor into during the difficult work of reprocessing.
And Taylor Swift—if you’re reading, I’m ready for my hug. 💜
Sources and Recommended Reading
Kestly, T. (2014). The Interpersonal Neurobiology of Play: Brain-Building Interventions for Emotional Well-Being. Norton.
McDonald, M. C. (2023). Unbroken: The Trauma Response is Never Wrong. Sounds True.
Panksepp, J. (1998). Affective Neuroscience: The Foundations of Human and Animal Emotions. Oxford University Press.
Schore, A. N. (2019). The Development of the Unconscious Mind. Norton.
Siegel, D. J., & Bryson, T. P. (2011). The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind. New York, NY: Delacorte Press.